Stress-Free Tips on How to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend

Lovesickness is real and you've got it bad. The only cure? Learning how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend.

Updated April 25, 2023
Girls laying grass, one whispering to the other

Asking anyone out can be panic-inducing. Take a deep breath. Instead of working yourself up and psyching yourself out, learn how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend by finding the best spot, perfect words, and ideal time. Leave the jitters at home by arming yourself with these helpful tips.

Simple Steps to Asking Someone to Be Your Girlfriend

If you're just entering the dating scene or you've never really caught feelings for anyone yet, this might be your first time wrestling with the excitement and fear of asking someone to be in a relationship with you. It doesn't have to be hard, and you can use these three steps to get you from point A to point B the easiest way.

Step 1: Be Clear About Your Feelings

According to Psychology Today, one of the tips for preparing for an anxiety-inducing conversation is to consider how the other person's feeling. Be conscious of her feelings while planning what you want to say. Nervousness might make you fumble with your words and accidentally avoid asking the real question, which can make them more nervous in turn.

So, the first step is to be clear. The last thing you want is to want to walk away from the conversation wondering if she's your girlfriend or not.

Young man and young woman in hallway talking and smiling

Different Wording Suggestions to Communicate Your Feelings

There's no one right way to ask a girl to be your girlfriend. But, the key to asking her is to make sure you actually ask the question instead of beating around the bush.

Springing an unexpected question on someone means that they might not be ready to answer right away. Don't take their silence as a rejection; instead, suggest a specific day when you can check back in to get their answer.

If you're finding yourself at a loss for words, you can use one of these wording suggestions:

  • "Will you be my girlfriend?"
  • "You're the only girl I want. Will you please be my girlfriend?"
  • "I like you very much, and I'd like you to be my girlfriend. What do you say?"
  • "I know you and I would make a great couple. Will you be my girlfriend?"
  • "You'll make me the happiest person in the world if you say yes to being my girlfriend. What do you think?"
  • "I think it's time we take our friendship to the next level. Will you be my girlfriend?"
  • "We've got really great chemistry and I think we'd be perfect for eachother. Would you like to be my girlfriend?"
  • "Let me know if I'm misreading things, but it seems like you've got feelings for me and I've definitely got feelings for you, and I wondered if you'd like to be my girlfriend?"
  • "Want to make it official? You know, being my girlfriend?"

Step 2: Pick the Right Time and Place

The second step in asking a girl to be your girlfriend is picking out the right location and time. No one wants to think of romantic proclamations when they just got finished in gym class or are walking to their car after work.

Make It a Comfortable Spot

Setting the stage for asking a girl to be your girlfriend should revolve around what makes the both of you the most comfortable. Be sure to choose a location where the two of you will be able to focus on one another. Typically, this doesn't look like a crowded party where you're yelling over the sick bass, but something more intimate instead.

A special spot that means something to the two of you (such as where you first met or a place she loves) makes an ideal spot to ask because it adds romance and helps her understand how much time you spent thinking this over. She'll realize this wasn't a spur-of-the-moment decision and that you're already putting thought into your relationship.

Ask When the Two of You Are Alone

Also, it's best to ask without an audience; don't allow friends or bystanders to turn the situation into a spectacle or make her feel pressured. People clam up when they think they're being watched, so it's best to give them the private space they deserve.

Step 3: Learn When to Ask Someone to Be Your Girlfriend

Before asking a girl to be your girlfriend, it's important to look at your current life, responsibilities, and relationship to decide if you're ready for the commitment.

Know If You're Ready

Relationships aren't just something you can take back to the customer service desk and ask for a refund because it's not working. They take time, effort, and emotional maturity.

Because of this, most teens don't get into official romantic relationships until around 15 years old. What relationships mean to each person is different, but if you've been talking for two to three weeks, have been on four or five dates, and feel like you don't want to date other people, you might consider taking your relationship to an official status.

Don't Rush It

Try to select a moment when there aren't time constraints, so the conversation isn't rushed. For example, asking while passing through the halls on the way to the next class will probably make her feel like she's under pressure to decide and her knee-jerk reaction may be to say no.

How to Ask Her to Be Your Girlfriend Over Text

Though it may seem old-fashioned, asking someone to be your girlfriend is best done face-to-face when possible. If it has to happen via text or computer (such as with a long-distance relationship), you still want to make sure that you're clear about how you feel and where you'd like the relationship to move forward.

Send off one of these easy texts if you've got the long-distance dating bug:

  • "I only want to date you. Will you be my gf?"
  • "I'm ready to be your boyfriend. Are you ready to be my girlfriend?"
  • "Can we make it official and be boyfriend/girlfriend?"
  • "Would you do me the honor of being my girlfriend?"
  • "I'm in this for the long-term, wanna be my girlfriend?"
  • "I've been trying to work up the nerve to ask you for weeks, and I've finally got it. Do you want to be my girlfriend?"
  • "I woke up this morning and had the thought that the only thing that'd make my day better would be having you as a girlfriend. What do you say?"
  • "I've never felt this way about anyone before, so I'm not sure how this usually goes. But I really want you to be my girlfriend. What do you think?"
Girl sitting on dock and smiling at her phone
Helpful Hack

Don't turn your question into a weird game of telephone. If you want a girlfriend, you need to be able to ask them out yourself, not have a buddy do it for you.

Memorable & Creative Ways to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend

If you take some time beforehand to plan out the moment, there are plenty of memorable ways to ask a girl to be your girlfriend. From something super sentimental for the gal in touch with her emotions to the playful setups to keep her spirits up, these are all great ideas for anyone asking a new girl to be their girlfriend.

Go Playful With an Outdoor Set-Up

If you're not one for making a big spectacle but you still want something that they're going to enjoy talking about later, you can plan a nice outdoor setup. Write out your question in chalk, either in their driveway or along their walking path to school. Of course, you want to make sure you're still around when they see it so they know who exactly has their eye on them.

Pose the Question Using a Sweet Treat

If you've got your eye on a gal who's got a sweet tooth or you've got quite the talent in the kitchen, then you might want to let your confectionary creations speak for you. You can whip up a homemade cake, batch of cupcakes, or cheesecake and write out your question on top.

Really Show Your Humor with a Cute Gag

If you want to make her smile before springing the question on her, you'll probably want to pitch something a little funny. One corny but cute way to set up your scenario is to give her a heart (jewelry, or drawn, or folded paper etc.) and ask her, "Now that I've given you my heart, will you be my girlfriend?"

Use a Surprise Recording

There ain't no party like a Build-a-Bear party. A store that usually caters to young kids' birthday wishes can be a pit stop on your way to asking the person you're interested in to be your girlfriend. Pick out a stuffed animal that screams her style, and after you get it stuffed, select one of the hearts you can record a message to playback. Record your short and sweet question asking them to be your girlfriend. Gift it to them and tell them to give it a squeeze.

Guy giving girl teddy bear

Organize Their Favorite Celebrity Figure to Ask

If the apple of your eye has a favorite celebrity, online figure, author, influencer etc, you can really make your girlfriend question special by having them ask her the question. Apps like Cameo, where you can hire a celebrity to send you a video message for a flat fee, make connecting with people's favorite figures so much easier.

Or, if they're someone with a well-known online platform, you can reach out to their management or through their social messages directly to see if they're interested.

Make the Big Moment Special

It's important to go into the moment confident and ready. Whether you plan something elaborate or keep it low key, just make sure your intentions are clear, and you're respectful of whatever answer they give. But, don't let asking a girl out turn into something stressful. Although it can be hard if the answer isn't what you're hoping for, you'll be stronger and have a little more experience in the relationship arena from the experience. As long as your're honest and true to being yourself, you can't go wrong.

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Stress-Free Tips on How to Ask a Girl to Be Your Girlfriend