Is Dating Your Best Friend a Good Idea? Exploring Pros & Cons

Published March 16, 2021
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It can feel really difficult to know whether it's a good idea to pursue dating your best friend or not. When it comes to sharing your feelings, or beginning a romantic relationship with your best friend, the stakes can be really high, so it's best to take your time weighing out this major decision.

Pros and Cons of Dating Your Best Friend

Whether you are in the contemplation process of sharing your feelings with your best friend or are still deciding if pursuing a romantic relationship with them is a good idea, understanding the pros and cons can help you make an informed decision.

Reasons to Date Your Best Friend

Reasons to date your best friend:

  • You know each other really well and are already committed to each other.
  • They may already know your most embarrassing and shameful moments and have been there for you.
  • You've likely seen each other through your ups and downs.
  • You know each other's quirks.
  • You already love and accept each other as is.
  • You know how to make each other smile.
  • You may know each others' family.
  • You can skip the getting to know you phase of dating.
  • Your relationship may get serious fast.
  • Could be an incredible romantic relationship.
  • May be able to date, breakup, then go back to being friends over time versus losing the friendship after the breakup.

Reasons You Shouldn't Date Your Best Friend

Reasons you should consider not dating your best friend:

  • Your relationship may get serious fast.
  • Dating may lead to a breakup and possibly end your friendship.
  • Dating may feel awkward.
  • There's no getting to know you dating phase.
  • One or both of you may not be able to transition into a romantic relationship.
  • You may have different romantic relationship needs that don't align and lead to a breakup.
  • It could negatively impact your mutual circle of friends, whether you date or breakup.
Man and woman sat together

Dating Your Best Friend

Sharing your romantic feelings with your best friend can work out amazingly well, but it can also lead to awkwardness, or even a loss of friendship. Before deciding whether you should pursue dating your best friend, ask yourself:

  • Can I live with never telling my best friend my true feelings for them?
  • Am I willing to risk losing our friendship if it doesn't work out romantically or if they don't reciprocate similar feelings towards me?
  • Do I get the feeling they are interested in dating me as well? Is our relationship flirty?
  • Am I pursuing this out of convenience, or do I have genuine romantic feelings? Take a quiz to find out more.

Do Relationships With Your Best Friend Work?

Relationships with best friends may work out, but they also may not. This will depend on your unique situation with your best friend. Unfortunately there is no absolute way to know for certain whether a relationship with your best friend will work out. There will always be some risk involved in sharing your feelings, or pursuing a relationship.

Do Best Friends Make Good Lovers?

Best friends can make good lovers if you both feel comfortable sharing your romantic needs and desires with each other. One or both of you may also feel somewhat awkward or tense in crossing this line with each other if you've had a platonic friendship for a while.

Friends to Dating Transition

While some best friends may transition to dating with ease, others may have a more difficult time doing so. Keep in mind that:

  • Getting used to seeing each other romantically may take some time to ease into.
  • A friendship can create an amazing foundation for a romantic relationship, but romantic relationship needs and expectations should still be discussed on an ongoing basis.
  • When transitioning from friends to dating, change up your typical friendship activities and swap them for something with a little more romance. This can help you ease into seeing each other in a more romantic way.

Should You Date Your Best Friend?

Deciding to date your best friend or share your romantic feelings for them can feel overwhelming. Take your time deciding whether this is the best decision for you and if you're willing to risk having your relationship changed or even lost if it doesn't work out.

Is Dating Your Best Friend a Good Idea? Exploring Pros & Cons