Your parents lived whole lives before you were born and after you flew the coop. Get to know them inside and out with these essential questions to ask your parents before they die. After all, no one's promised tomorrow, including your parents.
115+ Questions to Ask Your Parents Before They Die
Your parents aren't these mythical figureheads entirely out of reach. Rather, they're human just like you. Get to the heart of what makes them tick, the memories they made along the way, and the important pearls of wisdom they want you to keep with these meaningful questions.
Questions About Your Parents' Relatives/Family
Not everyone is blessed to grow up around relatives. With these family-oriented questions, you can learn about your parents' upbringing and the traditions and heritage you come from.
- What were your nicknames growing up?
- Can you tell me a little about your sibling(s)?
- Who were you closest to in your immediate family?
- What were your parent(s) or caregiver(s) like when you were growing up?
- What lessons were stressed in your household?
- What unique family traditions did you participate in?
- How was any family conflict resolved?
- How did your parents express love?
- Who was the funniest member of the family?
- Who was the most competitive person in your family?
- Did you have any family pets?
- What is the first home you remember living in?
- Who were your favorite neighbors growing up?
- Did you have to share a room with anyone?
- What did your parent(s) or caregiver(s) do for work?
- Who was the oldest family member you remember being around? What were they like?
- Are there any family scandals I don't know about?
- Is there a family member you absolutely loathed?
- Which family member's house did you enjoy spending time at the most?
- Which family member do I remind you the most of?
- Which family member do I resemble the most?
Questions to Ask Your Parents About Their Childhoods
It may be hard to imagine, but once upon a time, your parents were little kids themselves. Discover the wild things they got up to and the mistakes they made along the way with these childhood-centered questions.
- What's one of the best childhood memories you can recall?
- Which birthday was your favorite, and why?
- What was your favorite gift you ever received?
- What was a difficult childhood moment for you?
- What were you like as a child?
- Who were your best friends growing up?
- Did you collect anything?
- What hobbies did you enjoy in your childhood?
- What was your favorite childhood book?
- What subject was your favorite in school?
- What was your favorite toy?
- Did you have a favorite family trip?
- What was your favorite game to play?
- What were your dreams or hopes as a child?
- What was your school experience like?
- What were your plans after you finished school?
- What is your scariest memory from when you were a kid?
- What's one thing you miss from your childhood you wish you could bring back?
- What article of clothing do you wish you could bring back from your childhood?
- Did you have a favorite parent as a child?
- Did you ever have to go to the ER? If so, what for?
- Did you ever make the news as a kid?
- How was your childhood bedroom decorated?
- What toy did you always want but never got?
Questions That'll Make Your Parents Reflect
Having experienced the ups and downs of life for decades, your parents probably have a lot of wisdom to share with you. Get those important nuggets before they're gone with these questions that'll make your parents reflect on their past.
- Is there anything you wish you could have done differently in your 20s?
- What's one of the best decisions you ever made, and why?
- What was the best date you've ever been on like?
- When did you know you were ready to have your first child?
- Looking back, do you think having kids was the right move at that time in your life?
- What was it like transitioning from a solo adult to a first-time parent?
- How many times have you been in love?
- Do you have a "one that got away"?
- What's your favorite parenting memory?
- What was the hardest aspect of being a parent?
- How did you overcome challenges as an adult?
- What sticking point do you wish you had relented more on?
- Who were your closest friends as an adult?
- What's one thing you always want to be remembered for?
- What are your biggest regrets?
- What feels like the biggest accomplishment to you?
- What was your favorite family activity to do?
- What was the hardest decision you've ever had to make?
- Was there a moment that changed your life significantly?
- What was your worst coping mechanism?
- What are you most grateful for?
- What's the best advice you've ever received and who gave it to you?
- What do you think made you a good parent?
- What's one thing you're really proud of yourself for that you've never told anyone about?
- Are there things you still struggle with that you wish you could change about yourself?
Fun Questions to Ask Your Parents
Just because your parents are going to die someday doesn't mean conversations have to be serious all the time. Inject a little fun into your questioning with these light-hearted queries.
- What's the first movie you remember seeing in theaters?
- Have you ever been in a major accident?
- What was the worst natural disaster you've experienced?
- What was the make & model of your first car?
- What was your favorite concert experience?
- Who was your first celebrity crush?
- If you could buy any piece of art, what would it be?
- What is your funniest memory of parenting me?
- Have you ever been pulled over by the cops? If so, for what?
- Have you ever had to call 9-1-1?
- What did you always spend your allowance on (if you got one)?
- What's the worst crime you've ever committed?
- What does your ideal retirement look like?
- What conspiracy theory have you always been intrigued by?
- What was your favorite late-night program?
- Did you ever hitchhike? What was it like?
- Did you ever sneak out? If so, to do what?
- What's your favorite quote or saying?
- What book do you recommend everyone reads, and why?
Related: 50 Questions to Ask Your Grandparents That'll Pull the Curtain Back on Their Lives
Deeper Questions to Ask Your Parents
Delve deep into your parents' moral and philosophical opinions with these hard-hitting questions. Nothing brings two people together quite like pondering the mysteries of the universe.
- What words have you lived by?
- What's the meaning of life to you?
- Why do you think you were put on this Earth?
- Do you think we're all inherently good?
- Do you believe in a higher power?
- What's your relationship with the afterlife?
- Have you ever experienced anything you can't explain (spiritual, supernatural, etc.)?
- What do you think happens after someone passes away?
- What's one secret you've never told anyone?
- How do you think people will describe you when you're gone?
- What do you think makes our family special?
- Do you think there's life beyond Earth?
- If you could be brought back years into the future, would you want to be?
Consider video recording these conversations with your parents to look back on their responses after they've passed.
Logistical Questions You Need to Ask Your Parents Before They Die
It's an uncomfortable topic, but you can't avoid discussing your parent's end-of-life wishes forever. Ensure that everything goes smoothly by asking your parents these logistical questions before they pass.
- Do you have a will? Where is it located?
- Do you have a life insurance policy? Where are the documents for it?
- Do you have any investment accounts? How do I access them?
- What is your social security number? Where is your social security card?
- Where can I find the account information for your checking and savings accounts?
- Where is the title to your cars?
- Where is the deed to your house?
- Do you already have a burial plot?
- Do you want to be buried or cremated?
- If you want to be cremated, what would you like us to do with your ashes?
- Do you want a traditional funeral? Are there any specific requests?
- If you don't have a will, how do you want your estate divided?
- Do you have any debt? How can I access/contact those accounts?
- Are there any family heirlooms you specifically want kept in the family?
Make the Most of the Time You Have
The best way to help your parents' memories live on is by learning everything you can about them before they're gone. Whether you want to sit down for an official recording session or pepper in some queries over time is totally up to you. When you're ready to start, these questions will lead the way.
