60 Valentine Jokes for Kids That Will Make Even Cupid Quiver With Laughter

These cute Valentine jokes will have your kids laughing all February!

Updated January 8, 2024
Laughing girl

Valentine jokes for kids are a choco-lot of fun and the perfect way to sweeten this already sugar-filled day! If you're looking for some whimsical quips and clever puns to use on Cupid's favorite holiday, then holster your arrows! We have a quiver filled with funny Valentine's Day jokes for kids that will make you and your little ones laugh for days. 

Cute Valentine Jokes for Kids About Animals

Kids love animals, and these cute Valentine jokes for kids have everything from funny animal pairs to punny animal-inspired expressions to help you celebrate this holiday. Hyenas may not mate for life, but they will definitely cackle at these sweet, silly, and cute Valentine jokes!

Valentine's joke about love birds

What do squirrels give their loved ones on Valentine's Day?

Forget-Me-Nuts

What do you call two love birds?

Tweethearts

What did Free Willy say to his girlfriend on Valentine's Day?

Whale you be mine?

What do monkeys say to their loved ones?

I'm bananas for you!

What did the hedgehog say to his date?

You look porcu-fine!

When do bed bugs fall in love?

In the Spring!

What did the Tyrannosaurus Rex say to his lady love?

You are dino-mite!

Why did the tiger breakup with his girlfriend?

She was a cheetah!

Did you know cows make great boyfriends?

They are legen-dairy at a-moos-ing their dates!

What did the warthog say to the sow?

Don't go bacon my heart!

How do lions express their love?

They talk about their felines!

What did Whitney Houston sing to the belugas on their first date?

I Whale Always Love You

Did you hear about the two geese who fell in love?

It was love at first flight!

How does a beekeeper ask for a Valentine?

Would you bee my honey?

RELATED: Click Un-bee-lievable Bee Jokes here

Fantastically Funny Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids About Food

Even pancakes can't stack up to these funny Valentine's Day jokes for kids! They'll have you and your kiddos flipping with laughter. Start off Valentine's Day breakfast with a joke written on a slip of paper in their cereal bowl, or take turns sharing these yummy jokes around the table for your family Valentine dinner. Food, fun, and Valentine jokes for kids are the recipe for a perfect holiday!

Valentine's joke about food

How did the strawberry respond to the chocolate's request for a date?

I'd love to berry much!

What did the pickle say to the hamburger?

You mean a great dill to me!

Why is pizza so good at getting dates?

It has great delivery.

What did the cantaloupe say to the honeydew?

You are one in a melon!

What should you order for breakfast on Valentine's Day?

A hug and a quiche!

Why did the egg drop soup and the miso soup get married on Valentine's Day?

Because their love was pho real!

What did the chips say to the avocado?

You guac my world!

How did the espresso end her Valentine's Day date with the hot tea?

She went ahead and kissed the chai!

Why should you be careful on a Valentine's Day date with a calzone?

He might steal a pizza your heart!

What did the tater tot say to the french fry?

You are one hot potato!

How does edamame pick up a date?

They let their potential suitor know that they've bean thinking about them!

Why do pumpkins never have trouble getting a date?

Because they're gourd-eous, both inside and out!

How does a Coke ask out a Sprite?

He tells her she is soda-rn cute!

What did the butter say to the bread on Valentine's Day?

You are the loaf of my life.

Why is artichoke dip the most loving appetizer?

Because it is all heart!

What is a piece of pizza's favorite pickup line?

Are you a personal pizza? Because you are made just for me.

How does coffee flirt?

It espressos its love for brew-tiful ladies who mocha it crazy!

Where does pasta like to go on Valentine's Day?

To the meatball!

Why does Mexican food always have the best time on a date?

It always has something to taco bout!

What did the grilled cheese say to the skillet?

You make me melt!

What did the bowtie pasta say to the linguini on their Valentine's Day date?

He told her that she looked nood-iful!

Why are sushi and chopsticks the perfect match?

They are soy-mates!

What does a shy leafy green say to a date request?

Kale me maybe.

Did you hear about the pizza and the scallion who got married on Valentine's Day?

Their love goes on, onion, onion, onion!

Why is a breakfast house the best place to take your Valentine's Day date?

They pancake their eyes off of you!

Quick Tip

If you want to make DIY valentines for friends and family, cute Valentine jokes and Valentine's Day quotes can be the perfect captions for your cards! All you need is paper, stickers, crayons, markers, and a bit of creativity! Let's be honest — homemade cards are always more meaningful and these are guaranteed to make the recipient smile!

Fun Valentine Jokes for Kids to Fill Their Hearts With Glee

Valentine jokes for kids don't have to follow a specific theme. When it comes to the idea of love, pairing up, and paying compliments, your imagination can run wild with cute Valentine jokes to share with your little ones, and these are sure to have you giggling with glee!

Valentine's joke about thunderstorms

Which flowers give the best kisses?

Tulips

Are shoes and socks a good couple?

Of course! They make a great pair.

Why do soccer players dislike Valentine's Day?

They hate getting red cards.

What did the gum say to the shoe?

I'm stuck on you!

What did the telescope say to Saturn on Valentine's Day?

Hubble, hubble! 

Why did the florist turn down the gardener for a Valentine's Day date?

She thought he was too rough around the hedges!

How does a thunderstorm pay a compliment to lightning?

It says it looks striking!

What does a goblin call his lady love?

His Ghoul-friend!

Why are trees tremendous dates?

They always be-leaf in love!

What is a tornado's favorite game to play on a date?

Twister!

Did you hear about the pirate who crashed his ship on the way to pick up his date?

He was a nervous wreck!

What did the two fossilized dinosaurs put as their relationship status on Facebook after their Valentine's Day dinner?

They listed themselves as carbon dating!

How do candles feel after they're blown out at the end of Valentine's Day?

Delighted!

Cute Knock Knock Valentine's Day Jokes for Kids

Knock-knock jokes are a great way to inject some silly humor into your family and classroom Valentine's celebrations! These cute Valentine jokes are sure to hit the mark this holiday!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Whisk
Whisk who?
Whisk me away this Valentine's Day!

Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Brie
Brie who?
Brie mine, Valentine!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Cocoa
Cocoa who?
Cocoa-nuts for you!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Will
Will who?
Will you be my Valentine?

Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Olive
Olive who?
Olive you very much!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Choc
Choc who?
I'm choc-full of love for you!

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heart
Heart who?
Heart to believe that it's already Valentine's Day!

Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Bee
Bee who?
Bee my Valentine?

Share the Laughs With Kid-Friendly Valentine's Jokes

Everyone loves a good laugh, so make your kid's day brighter by writing out these funny and cute Valentine jokes and slipping them into their lunchboxes each day. You can use these throughout the month of love and even have some to spare.

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60 Valentine Jokes for Kids That Will Make Even Cupid Quiver With Laughter