67 School Jokes for the First Day & Beyond That'll Get You on the Humor Roll

These jokes about school will make you the talk of the class!

Updated June 27, 2023
Two boys having fun at the school and laughing

Whether it's the first day of school or the middle of the semester, funny jokes for kids about school can help keep their education entertaining and allow them to let off a little steam.

First-day-of-school jokes, one-liners, back to school puns, and knock knock jokes about teachers, learning, and certain subjects that stump the best of us can be a great way make the school day go by faster! We've laid out quite the lesson plan on laughter so go ahead and hit the books.

First-Day-of-School Jokes

The best way to break the ice on the first day of school is by saying something silly! These jokes about school are guaranteed to get the grade.

First Day of School Joke

Did you hear about the piece of paper who fell in love with the binder on the first day of school?

They love each other a hole punch!

What did the math book say to the calculator on their first day of school?

"You can count on me to solve your problems!"

Did you hear about the leprechaun who got to skip preschool and go straight to kindergarten after his first day back at school.

Turns out he already knew his elf-a-bet!

Why did the ruler feel lonely on the first day of school?

It had no one to measure up to!

What does a buffalo say to his son when he drops him off for the first day of school?

Bi-son.

Why are plants always prepared for math class on their first day of school?

Because they have their square roots down!

What did the clock say to the students on the first day of school?

"I'll be keeping a close watch on your attendence!"

Why did the backpack feel relieved on the first day of school?

It finally had a shoulder to lean on!

What did the geometry teacher say to the circle and the square on the first day of school?

"Let's get this class in shape!"

Why did the computer teacher feel energized on the first day of school?

She was ready to byte out of a new year of teaching technology!

What does a duck always keep in his backpack?

A quack-u-lator.

Back-to-School Puns

Who doesn't like a good play on words? If you want to wow your English teacher, consider sneaking one of these back to school puns into your class's conversation. They are bound to break the tense-ion!

  • The power went out on the fist day of school. The students were de-lighted.
  • My new English teacher is write. This class is lit!
  • I'm never going to compete for valedictorian. I just found out that there are a bunch of Canadians in my class. They always get straight Eh's!
  • There is a hen in my algebra class who is already the teacher's pet after one day! She is some sort of mathema-chicken!
  • I am really excited to start my Intro to Physics class today! I read a book on gravity over the summer and couldn't put it down!
  • Did you hear about the dinosaur who didn't want to go back to school? He was a nervous Rex!
  • The best way to compliment a pencil on the first day of school is to tell him that he is looking sharp!
  • I forgot to bring my beakers to chemistry class on the first day. Thankfully, my teacher says that he will come up with a solution!
  • A bee never has to worry about getting to school on time as long as he catches the school buzz.

Clean Jokes About School

Clean jokes about school are great for kids of all ages because they will only bring the fun, and never detention. These cheesy jokes are a wonderful way to start or celebrate the year in a lighthearted way.

Clean Jokes About School

What kind of law did the school pass?

A class act!

Why did the student grab a bunch of balloons?

So she could rise to the top of the class!

Why was the student covered in ideas?

Because she got caught in a brainstorm!

Why couldn't the student put her winter hat on?

Because she was already wearing her thinking cap!

What did the student say when the teacher asked why his paper only had a small line drawn on it?

"I drew a blank."

Why couldn't the ghost leave the school building?

He was the school spirit!

Why does the yardstick love history so much?

He gets to learn about rulers.

What dinosaur is a wiz at English?

The thesaurus!

Did you hear about the school supplies that got in a fight?

The scissors got a bit snippy when the pencil made an excellent point!

School Knock Knock Jokes

Kids love knock knock jokes because they're simple, yet surprising. The best school knock knock jokes use school related themes combined with the word "who" to create a silly new sentence.

  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Spell. Spell who? W-H-O!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Nobel. Nobel who? I said there was no bell! That's why I am late to class!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Glue. Glue who? No one, we don't put glue on people!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Homework. Homework who? Home were cooler than school!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Teach. Teach who? Bless you!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Abe. Abe who? AbeCDEFG!
  • Knock, Knock. Who's there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Nevermind...this joke is pointless.

Amusing Jokes About Teachers & Educators

Every teacher is unique, but some are funnier than others. If you want to school your teacher in comedy, try these funny teacher-themed jokes about the subjects they teach!

Amusing Jokes About Educators

Why did the school librarian get fired?

Because she hit the books!

What is the social studies teacher's favorite thing to do?

Tell his-story!

Why do science teachers stare at their students?

They're hoping to get a reaction!

Why does the geography teacher always carry a globe?

It means the world to her!

What kind of transportation does a tutor prefer using?

A mentor-ship!

Why didn't the librarian trust her room?

Because it always starts with a li (lie)!

What is a math teacher's favorite season?

Sum-mer!

Why do teachers hate having astronauts in their class?

Because they are always spacing out in class!

One-Liner Jokes for Elementary School

For those kids rushing to class, keep your first-day-of-school jokes short and sweet with a clever one-liners about school!

  • Geology rocks, but geography is where it is at!
  • Not all math classes are bad. Just sum.
  • If you want to cut class, then just bring scissors to school.
  • The kid with perfect attendance doesn't just love school, he never misses it!
  • A is the only letter who isn't a bully because it never goes after other letters!
  • Students have to walk in straight lines because if they walked in circles, they'd never get to class!
  • Snakes are always good at hiss-tory class.
  • If you want to get straight A's, then use a ruler!
  • Art supplies are always the most eager to go back to shool. Absence makes the art grow fonder!

School Holiday Jokes

From Easter jokes for kids to seasonal funnies like spring jokes for children, school holiday jokes make celebrations much more fun. These days can include federal holidays and school-specific occasions like the 100th day of school or first day of school.

School Holiday Joke

How do zombies celebrate holidays at school?

With brain games!

What do skeletons get when they answer an extra credit question?

Bone-us points!

Why are Christmas lights so smart?

Because they're bright!

What do you call it when Saint Nick takes a breath after a comma?

A Santa pause!

Why did the 100th day of school act like a baby?

Because he wasn't even one year old!

Why does Saint Patrick's Day always look sick before a test?

Because he is very clover, but not very smart!

How many monsters are good at algebra?

None, unless you count Dracula!

How did the firework pass all of his exams?

He studied his spark notes!

A+ End-of-School-Year Jokes

Finally, teachers can send their students off for summer break with some fun words to remember them by. End of the school year jokes can cover the last day of school, kindergarten graduation, or the start of summer vacation.

You just passed biology! Do you know what you should do next?

Cell-ebrate!

Why is the last day of school so positive?

Because you don't have to deal with any more problems!

What did June say to the next month when he said that school was starting early?

Ju-lie!

How do gym teachers spend their summer?

Catching rays!

What ceremony do horses attend at the end of school?

Gradu-neigh-tions!

How do you say goodbye to your math book on the last day of school?

I'll calc-u-lator!

Need to Know

The end of the school year is an exciting time and while jokes are always welcome, don't forget to let your teacher know how much you appreciate them! Teacher gifts and thank you notes are a great way to let them know that even the class clown thinks their teaching deserves an A+!

Laugh Your Way Through School

For many kids, humor is a doorway to education. Teachers can get their class excited about learning by sharing school jokes in fun and creative ways. Students can also start conversations and make new friends with clever quips about the classes they share. No matter who needs a laugh, first day of school jokes and jokes about school are a wonderful way to have fun while learning!

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67 School Jokes for the First Day & Beyond That'll Get You on the Humor Roll